Monday, November 21, 2005

Is it cold in here?

Because of escalating heating an energy costs, my place of employment has elected to keep the office at a lower temperature this winter in an effort to cut costs. Apparently, what with the feds busy hating poor people and cutting funds for the programs that serve them, we are in a bit of a budget pinch. Not a crisis, mind you, just a pinch. In any case, the office will now be kept at 68° during open hours and 60°. In addition, the use of electric space heaters has been absolutely forbidden as they cost too much to operate. (I am the exception. Because my office has poor duct work and is notoriously 10° colder than any office in the building during the winter – and 10° hotter in summer – I am allowed to keep using mine.)

I know what you’re thinking: How are we going to keep warm, especially given the fact that we actually DO have clients who were born in barns (literally) and, therefore, never feel a need to close the door? As can always be depended on, the management has come up with a thrifty and logical solution: lap blankets. And no, I’m not kidding. We’ve been instructed to put blankets over our laps to keep warm in the frigid, raging winter winds.

In other completely true news: I’m proud to announce that we now have a new piece of artwork for the office. It’s a shitty, old, faded water color portrait of a Native American woman on a horse. The kicker? It only took $400 to have it framed and matted. Can you believe it? Hmm...I wonder…can we burn it for heat?

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